THEY FRIED HER BRAIN-- GUEST POST ON BAD ECT AT CENTENNIAL PEAKS

THIS IS AN IMPORTANT GUEST POST

TO PROTECT HER, HER NAME IS BEING WITHHELD

I SALUTE HER COURAGE IN TELLING HER STORY HERE

CENTENNIAL PEAKS MUST BE SHUT DOWN -- NOW!

I was committed to CPH the first time a few years back to start a course of ECT because I simply could not get any recovery from severe depression after managing for 40 years to avoid the twin indignities of being locked up in a mental hospital and having my brain fried. They lied about the process and the aftereffects. The first time I had it, I peed my pants and was forced to pull off my wet clothing and stand half naked in a room full of waiting staff and patients of both sexes to put on scrubs.  The only nod toward my privacy and common decency was to allow me to turn my back so they got only a great view of my bare ass instead of my crotch.  I was too dazed and confused to object, so they blatantly took advantage of that instead of troubling themselves to walk me to the bathroom 6 feet away with a FEMALE staff member. I am an over-60 year old woman!

I got committed there again more recently when I was also diagnosed with dementia in addition to BPDll. I lost my job because I could not perform the sophisticated work anymore, lost 45% of my IQ points, can no longer express myself well, can’t perform any hobby activities, can’t read well, can’t write without multiple rewrites (I have always been able to write each piece ONCE, perfectly) and face a future of sitting in a pile of shit, drooling down my face.  I accidently let it slip to a counselor in Boulder that I preferred to die and they sent me to this hell hole to punish me for admitting that.

They locked me up on a ward full of addicts because they obviously lied and claimed to have a mental health unit bed available.  I worked in addictions for years and observed very large numbers of people who checked themselves in to avoid prosecution, avoid paying child support, have an excuse to quit working, manipulate spouses, become better addicts, decrease the amount of drugs they need for a while, nor just take all-expense-paid vacation on somebody else’s dime.  It was no different here, given the laughing, gaming and partying that went on all evening long.  Aside from all that, I’m not an addict and shouldn’t have been stuck in there under any circumstances. I RAN much bigger, better, and professional programs for 30 years.

They sat me on a metal and plastic chair in a hallway in a hospital gown, in full view of EVERYONE, including men, freezing, for an hour and a half. No one even bothered to speak with me though I was crying constantly. (One male patient expressed his concern for my humiliation. NO staff member did.) They didn’t even bother to give me a drink of water, a robe or a blanket to cover myself.

Eventually, they proceeded to make me stand up with my butt hanging out (I am a 60+ year old woman!) to weigh and measure me for the entertainment of a ward-full of people, male and female. I objected as well as I could given my state but they didn’t care and refused to stop.  They mocked me for my embarrassment. (“NOBODY CARES WHAT OTHER PEOPLE WEIGH ANYWAY!” Nyah nyah nyah.) Did you ever get to be the fat kid shamed by the school nurse by being weighed and measured in front of the whole school? They thoroughly enjoyed publicly humiliating a geriatric mentally ill demented woman.

They kept me there for almost two days with no treatment and refused to provide any vegetarian food. I placed a call to the patient “advocate” who despite my 11 day stay there, NEVER showed up at all. 

A couple of addiction counselors showed up to interview me, obviously having not troubled themselves to read the record ahead of time or they would have known that I was being warehoused there and was not an addict at all.

When they eventually transferred me to the mental health unit, the staff STILL never bothered to even talk to me about why I was there.  The whole time I was there, ONLY ONE STAFF MEMBER ever even bothered to listen to me (and pointed out to me that she only had 5 minutes “to spare!”) to even hear my circumstances,  and that was only after I laid in bed and sobbed for an entire shift. Neither she nor any other staff member ever asked me again how I was doing other than in casual, passing remarks.

They continued their cruel and unprofessional practice of weighing, measuring and taking vital signs in public with a bunch of patients sitting in a row watching the whole process.  I am mentally ill, therefore I deserve to be shamed, right?

They provide NO therapy at all. (Oops, they did have coloring books!)

You see a random psychiatrist for MAYBE 5-7  minutes a day to answer a couple of yes or no questions of THEIR choosing.  

To trick insurance companies, government agencies and hospital accreditation organizations, they schedule moronic classes during the day, which are also NOT any type of therapy.  The content might be appropriate life-skills training for very stupid 10 year olds.  The whole thrust of these classes is that if you weren’t too stupid and incompetent to run your own life, you wouldn’t have been locked up in here.  So much for the medical model of mental illness. I asked both of the psychiatrists WTF I had to do to get out of that place and they both told me to attend these stupid piece-of-shit, social work 101 classes. I asked THEM if either one had ever bothered to actually attend this crap they are peddling but they refused to answer and got defensive.

Only ONE of the “mental health professionals” (read that “NO real professional qualifications”) ever sat with and talked to any patients at all, and he limited that to the partying, smoking loud-mouthed moochers.

The unit was packed with a bunch of Medicaid frauds who were definitely NOT depressed at all, but were mostly frequent flyers who check their butts into the place for free food and a vacation. (Free to THEM of course since I WORKED my whole life for the privilege of paying for medical insurance, taxes and then paying thousands of dollars in copays to subsidize their free vacations.  

The majority of them of them laughed, played games and partied loudly all evening, every evening and showed absolutely NO signs of depression.  I believe there were a total of 4 people over an 11 day period who were not malingering. Even the staff at that place could not possibly be stupid enough to be unaware of that. But as long as they get to keep sucking money out of the pockets of working people, they’ll keep these frauds as long as they can.  Did any member of the staff EVER quiet down their screeching, squealing and laughter?  OF COURSE NOT!  Those of us who were actually suffering were totally disregarded and trampled. Interestingly, these oh-so-poor public assistance guests that I ended up paying for were with two exceptions well able to afford to burn up my tax money in cigarettes at $6.00/pack and got the privilege of stinking up the only outdoor area with smoke, making breathing non-carcinogenic air too damn much for the rest of us to expect.

The place itself is crappy and tacky with dirty plastic and metal chairs that lack even basic comfort for people who aren’t allowed to do anything except sit in them all day. Those nasty germy things were NEVER sanitized. There is not one comfortable, decent-quality piece of furniture in the place except under the MDs’ butts. The beds are not much better than jail cots.

In 11 days, my room was NEVER swept or mopped and the bathroom was never cleaned-NOT ONCE-despite the fact that I was forced to share it.  At almost $2000/day, they could cut loose and buy some Pine Sol. Interestingly though, when I approached the desk to ask the ”nurse” (I’d be surprised if she were a real one) a question, I was snapped at, ordered to step away from the desk and reprimanded for touching the desk and spreading germs.  Other patients were treated the same way.  Guess they can’t extract big enough copays for antibacterial wipes.

There were three vegetarian/vegan persons on the unit but the hole refused to provide appropriate meals.  When I asked what the vegetarian protein source was for one meal, the employee poked his fork at a piece of broccoli with a sprinkle of cheese on it.

The three of us ate virtually nothing because we could not be sure whether ANYTHING was animal-flesh free and because the rest of the food looked like previous patients had already eaten it.  NOBODY cared.  I personally mentioned this to 2 different psychiatrists on 3 separate occasions, to nurses and “mental health counselors,” and left messages for the patient “advocate”[sic] but the imaginary advocate never contacted me and none of them did anything about it.  The other two persons also complained and were ignored as well. This was particularly problematic because if you are scheduled for ECT, they are supposed to send a snack late in the evening since you cannot eat in the morning before the procedure regardless of how late they take you, and they don’t give a rat’s ass how ill they make you waiting.  What did they send?  Animal carcass sandwiches.  Once they sent a "vegetarian meal" – a half of a dry curled up raw pepper. The three of us asked for a less-disgusting alternative but were told that they "couldn’t find any other food!"  And ONCE AGAIN, no patient advocate ever showed up at all, and NONE of the staff would do a damn thing to fix this.

This scummy place also forces ADULTS to LINE UP in the hall like little children to march to and from dinner. They liked to make everyone line up early and then just stand there and wait until someone got good and ready to escort us. Lots of respect for our dignity, right? They have excellent passive-aggressive skills.

All night long, every night, the staff members stomped on and off the unit slamming the double fire doors behind themselves.  Complained to the psychiatrists but again, too damn bad. 

The unit was kept so cold that patients had to sit around wrapped in blankets all the time.  Did any staff member give a rat’s ass about this absurd situation?  No, of course not. People were sleeping under multiple (3-5) blankets, but that place is way too cheap to provide adequate central heating apparently! 

I approached the desk once to ask the ”nurse” (I’d be surprised if she were a real one) a question and was snapped at and reprimanded for touching the desk and told to step back because I was spreading germs.  Other patients were treated the same way.  Guess they can’t extract copays for antibacterial wipes.

I was eventually was forced to acquiesce to ECT a second time to get out of there.  They make a point of SAYING they are not there to pressure anyone into it, but they just won’t let you leave, and since they don’t provide any other treatment, you have no choice. (Read that:  $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$) Once you’ve submitted, you can’t stop because your will is fried right out of your brain. 

When I said I would leave AMA, they threatened to tell the insurance company so they would refuse to pay for the WHOLE stay and said they would go after me for it. I was tricked into signing financial commitment papers when I was not competent to do so.

I woke up with a terrible, terrible headache after the first brain-fry, crying and holding my head in pain.  They still made me get off of the bed before I was ready and sit in a hard metal and plastic chair where I couldn’t even sit upright, hunched over, neck twisted and trying to avoid breathing because it hurt too much. They kept checking in every few minutes to see if I was ready to leave. I wasn’t, but they kept at it because the next person on the assembly line needed to get out of bed and sit up so the NEXT cog could lie down so I just submitted. I don’t blame the staff on that particular service for this.  They are being forced to provide substandard care to shove as many money-paying victims through as fast as they can.

The aftereffects of the ECT left me as dumb as a box of rocks for well over 6 months though they promised me that the memory problems were short-lived and were around for only the time of the frying.  That is bullshit. The smoke never really cleared. The decrement is broader, deeper and has permanent effects. Do they really not KNOW this, or are they just lying to trick sick people out of their money? Or maybe they just prefer to believe other self-serving doctors instead of their patients.